totally drained..

well last nite didnt go quite as well as i had hoped..i got jon cath'd and his last meds in him by 1130pm..then i went to bed only to be woken up frightened because sarah was standing right by my bed! i thought it was a stranger! it shocked scared me!! so she hopped into bed with me, then about 30 minutes later the wind was blowing thru the window and SLAMMED our masterbedroom door shut - SCARY again!!! then 30 minutes after that becca started crying and her crib is right against our bedroom wall, so she kept making her crib hit the wall all nite long, then it was time to get up already, i cath'd and rotated jon, gave him meds and a piece of bread -- it took me 30 minutes to do all that, then went back to bed only to be woken up AGAIN by becca, i decided to take her out of her crib and put her in a porta crib in sarah's room so i could sleep..
SO i only slept from 5-7am when the rest of the girls woke up..the kennedy's met me at 8am to get the family ready..wasn't quite enough time- but oh well..we'll have to fine tune that! i got jon cath'd and cherie fed him breakfast and i gave him meds, then i ran upstairs to throw something on and back downstairs to help get jon dressed..then load him in the wheelchair to load him in the truck..
we were grateful to see our last "outer darkness" back row left for us!! thanks everyone!! it was great to be there!!! we noticed all the primary kids constantly turning back and watching jon..it was too cute..
we didnt quite make it to sunday school, but we did make it to our other class..i went into elders quorum and taught them all how to give jon a "pressure release" so they could do it from now on..
as we left church everyone was talking to jon and saying so many wonderful positive things..it was so great! the primary and the youth were the best though have to say!!! to see how jon has impacted their lives - im speechless..its so tender and so loving..how he can quietly affect their lives..jon LOVED shaking hands with all the primary kids!! it was SOOO neat to see all of jons seminary students hugging him and shaking his hand and gathered around im - it was just awesome..jon felt SOOOOO loved by SOOOOO many people..its overwhelming..
were so grateful for so many people who care and want to help..leslie hornberger lives around the corner from us..she asked if she could do anything..and that she always drives by my house and just wants to walk in and do something..i told her I LOVE THOSE KINDS OF PEOPLE!!!! i love people that will just stop by ..walk into my house and find something to do..there is constantly something that i need help with..so i told her..if she drives by and has time..PLEASE dont hestitate to come in - i always have something i need help with!! same thing happened with kristen thompson..she stopped by last nite to drop off anna's carseat..she asked if she could help with anything..and me being SO BAD at asking..i told her.."nah..ill be okay" when really inside i was screaming PLEASE COME IN AND HELP ME!!! i dont know WHYYYYY that is sooo hard for me!!! i feel like everyone has their own lives and i dont want to bother them..anyway- i feel like im constantly bringing this up..like i told kristen..its maybe one of the "lessons" im suppose to learn from all of this..
while i was sitting in relief society and the president was explaining about how they were going to help "the hales family"..i sat in the back row in amazement of all these wonderful ladies that were going to help in any way that they could..it was TOTALLY uncomfortable for me..but soo wondferful at the same exact time...its very humbling to sit there and have others help to organize and find ways to help you...it was then i realized HOW crazy my life is..the president made the comment "we all need to help them in their new reality"..i think it hit me there too..this isnt a dream anymore..its our new way of life..i sit here and think..if i had to do what ive been doing since saturday morning all by myself..i dont know what would happen..i fear what would happen..but knowing that i have family, friends and ward members to help lighten that load..wow..i dont even know what to say..other then were just so grateful..
we made it home from church..anna fell asleep in the car..i knew something wasnt right with her..she felt really hot..i took her temp and it was 103.5...UGH so i gave her some liquid, motrim and we layed her down..poor thing..i hope its quick like the other 2 girls were..
well its now 2pm..i have one hour before i have to be back up again getting jon some meds and rotating him..he is WIPED out from today - as we all are..its for sure going to be super quiet around here- atleast we hope! hard to tell with 4 girls! he's a little woozy still from this new effexor..but we seem to think its working..jon will start physical therapy in the morning FINALLY!! his poor body is probably SOOOO tight though..we'll see how the day goes..