Trials are for others..not just yourself.

Maybe that's why God gives us trials.

It's honorable. It comes with deep responsibility. Our response to trials doesnt just affect us. It's not suppose to.

You become a complete open book (if you allow yourself). Judgements come-some are harsh & surprising. Some are tender & beautiful. I will be the FIRST to say "I could have done/handled some things differently." But it wouldnt be true to who I am or my character. Which needed to change.

Just today I have received two separate messages from people that know me. I am worried that maybe this "boost" of spirituality is preparing me for something in the near future!?

"Christina,
You don't know me, but I have followed your blog for years now and always been strengthened by your faith and wonderful attitiude! I never would have guessed in a million years I would be put in a position as a caregiver for my own husband, but last week he was diagnosed with brain cancer, and underwent brain surgery. I have thought of you a lot, and remembered things that helped you. Thanks for sharing your challenges. They really have blessed others!
love,
Wendy"

Niagra Fall of tears. Cleansing. Rejuvinating. Re-Energized. Strengthened.

"Have I told you about Christina? SHE is really an amazing woman! I totally admire and look up to her in so many ways- seriously- I have "known" her for over 4 years I think now- before her husband was in his accident and put in a wheelchair-she has 4 little girls and works really hard at everything she does- we "met" on a mormonchic, and then she started a blog and then I did.. that is how we have kept in touch- we have talked on the phone a few times- I feel like I totally know her although we have never met in person-ANYWAY... get to know her- you won't be sorry! While going through this trial with her husband she is still really beautiful, an incredibe mom, a service oriented person, hard worker, super funny, down to earth, an entrepruner, tell it like it is- and super friendly, all things I LOVE I could go on and on about her amazingness."
-Lauralee

WELL! That pretty much sums me right up then doesnt it.

SERIOUSLY THOUGH--I am WAY worried with all the "Nice-ities" coming my way!!!!!

Spring Break ING & reflect ING!

It was sooooooooooo nice to not wake up and shuffle kids out for school all week!

Monday: We hit 2 movies at the $2 theatre.
Tuesday: Took all four girls to the mall - Rachel bought herself more Vans, Sarah purchased her FIRST pair.
Wednesday: Beach at Corona Del Mar
Thursday: Bowling
Friday: Rented movies via Red Box (LOVE that thing!)
Saturday: Hiking in the hills

So looks like we had a good week of Spring-the weather was PERFECT total summer like.

As I went to bed Saturday night, I was reflecting on my week. Does anybody else do this? I think about the times I came up "short" in the motherhood department. I find myself saying, I could have done this better, that better, played more games with them, talked to them more etc etc etc etc ETC. Then I found my thoughts going towards "HELLO this is Satan's sharpest tool for mothers--to make us feel like we aren't doing a "good enough" job!

I realized that at this point, if I can get them to:

clean up their rooms everyday after school -JOB WELL DONE!
(I have to LITERALLY go up everyday to "check & pass it off")

brush their teeth- JOB WELL DONE!
(I have to LITERALLY smell their breath-that should win me a gold medal huh!)

read the scriptures with us and PAY ATTENTION-JOB WELL DONE!
(we are using this GREAT book that goes along with the scriptures)

pray as a family/personal prayers-JOB WELL DONE!
(we do this with Jon each night usually in our room)

spend one on one time-JOB WELL DONE!
(each Sunday we call them in one by one oldest to youngest, we ask them how their week went, is there anything they are struggling with, need help with, want our help with etc--they LOVE this & are surprisingly very open and honest)

My Patriarchal Blessing states "You will have noble children." THE PRESSURE!!! Maybe this is why I find myself reflecting & worrying that I keep coming up short to this. But I am reminded time and time again-Satan will do ANYTHING to wreck my family-including paralyzing Jon.

HE WILL NOT WIN. Can I get an AMEN!

Prepare, Preparing or Prepared???

For quite a while now I have had PREPARE on my mind a LOT lately. Not sure if it is because of our situation with Jon's injury? Our lack of income for FOUR LONG YEARS NOW? The constant earthquakes we keep having or the BIG one everyone else keeps having?!

One night I felt prompted to get a tubbermaid container and spend a FHE night having the girls get an old pair of sneakers, socks, jeans & a tshirt. We put our clothes into that tubbermaid container and put it in the cupboard upstairs in the hallway. One of my fears is, we have an earthquake in the middle of the night-we are all shoeless & me stuck in my religious wear!!

We may never need that tubbermaid in that certain spot. But maybe I just needed to follow that little prompting?

We also have a large rolling trash can that has 6 72 hour back pack kits complete with water, food, toilet paper, pad of paper, pens, wipes, cup, shampoo, soap, deodorant etc etc etc. This past FHE we pulled them out took inventory & then I purchased all new food. Kinda of funny-I THOUGHT it had only been a "couple" of years--my bad. We looked at the yummy crackers and carmel--um OOOPS it WAS ORIGINALLY crackers and cheese!! nasty.

This General Conference the girls will get to eat the oh so yummy emergency food and replace it with fresh food (obviously minus the "carmel & crackers!").

Within this large rolling trash can we have LOTS of supplies like flash lights, batteries, solar blankets, first aid kit, portable radio, tools, maps, 2 binders with TONS of emergency information, mask, even a bucket (cuz ya know someone may need to go potty!) etc etc etc. ALL of these things PLUS the 6 72 hour kit backpacks fit neatly into the rolling trash can. It's kinda like our "covered wagon!"









Again, we may never need these 72 hour kits. But we have felt prompted to take it seriously. Maybe once again, it's just about us being obedient to the promptings we feel for our own family.

Of course NOTHING brings as much comfort as being SPIRITUAL PREPARED! We were AGAIN having another lesson on being prepared. It was geared more towards "spiritually." I didnt quite FEEL LIKE my girls were "grasping the concept." I felt prompted yet again to be frank with them. Before I knew it, these words, sentences and thoughts came flying out of my mouth before I could edit! I turned to Rachel (almost 13) and said "Rachel, what if we had a serious earthquake and EVERYBODY died but you. Would you be spiritual strong enough to take care of yourself? To move on with your life? To get on your knees and ask for help? To know that Heavenly Father is with you even though your family was not?" Jon whipped his nervous eyes right over to me with the look of "ARE YOU JOKING ME?!?! What in the world!?"

SILENCE.

We talked about this. We spent time discussing this. Things were "grasped."

Lastly, we all know that in the end, if we are having a major fire or earthquake-Jons rules are to "Save Yourselves & Let Me Be!" --lovely huh.